Jake McGyllenhaal's Guide to Hot Yoga

Irrespective of whether today's Silly Jake Story is true or not, I must be allowed a moment to relish the particulars. According to the New York Daily News, 'Jake Gyllenhaal is setting female pulses aflutter when he attempts the downward dog. During a yoga session at Yas in Venice, Calif., the “Brokeback Mountain” star began sweating like a pig. To the delight of the female class members (and a few male), Jake whipped off his Facebook Addict T-shirt, wiped himself down and rode off on his bicycle.' Below is the yoga move in question and below that is Jake illustrating taking his t-shirt off.



A few things to note here. It is extremely questionable that Jake Gyllenhaal is able to 'sweat like a pig' because that is an unattractive image and Jake does not sweat unattractively. I will grant that he may have perspired profusely. Does Jake really own a 'Facebook Addict' t-shirt? Is Jake a Facebook addict or is he a t-shirt addict? I will allow that he can 'whip off' t-shirts as if it were an Olympic athletic sport. I have an image in my head, now, of Jake doing yoga almost as if it were a triathlon, leaping from yoga mat to bicycle seat. One can not possiby question the 'delight', or the speed with which the yoga classes are overfilling with lucky Californian Venetians.


While the story itself is just that, a story, it is undoubtedly true that Jake is a yoga buff and he is also bendy, supple and, as a result, probably able to hold a position for a considerable amount of time. I don't have pictures, alas, of Jake doing the downward dog, although I would obviously kill for them, but we are at least lucky in that we do have photos of Jake from over the years which do show him setting new standards of excellence in original and novel yoga postures.


I think it's fair to say that at some point we will have the Gyllenhaal Guide to Yoga for Beginners and Experts, in book and DVD formats, accompanied by the Jake Gyllenhaal yoga clothing line for children and adults - t-shirts an optional extra. Featuring prominently in the book, will be the 'Does my bum look big in this?' position...


...as well as the 'Come and get me' pose, which takes years to perfect.



Useful accessories to GyllenYoga include metal stressballs, girls standing in doorways who have a good grip and bucketloads of water.




Happy St Patrick's Day!

Whether you celebrate it or not, I wish everyone a happy St Paddy's Day, especially Jake McGyllenhaal, who, no doubt, did not get through making Brothers with Jim Sheridan without having at least one pint of the dark stuff afterhours.



Pictures from IHJ.